I'm not sure if tender mercy is the right word to use here but just 5 weeks after our son returned home another Elder that lived two houses up the street from our house returned home early from his mission. He had been out a year. Another family, another mother, was experiencing all the same things I was feeling and we quickly became a life line for each other. Our son's had grown up together. They attended Young Men's, got their Eagles and Duty to God awards, both were raised in homes where the gospel was central. And yet both families were now experiencing heartache and disappointment. We watched as both our boys struggled greatly with testimonies and a desire to remain active in the church. They both fell away for a time. I started to wonder if early release missionaries going inactive was another rite of passage of this journey. Maybe that should be included in the pamphlet that should be outside the Bishop's office.
My friend and I spent the first summer of our son's returns walking (see blog post Sept. 2012 "No escaping the title of ERM...) and talking about the journey we were on. We found strength and comfort in each other and by the end of the summer we felt we had grown and healed a little bit. We were both ready for the next phase of life to begin. By fall, both our son's had returned to activity in the church and both had the light of Christ in their eyes. My son had moved away but her son lived at home and still attended our ward.
One cold day in January, not long after my son had dropped his announcement of his desire to return to the mission field, my friend's son had been asked to come to Relief Society and talk about the Priesthood, his duties, and what it meant to him. He is an amazing young man from an equally amazing family and he did a great job. All the sisters were enjoying listening to him and admiring him for his bravery and honesty. He had been asked to speak about the duties of an Elder and one of those duties was serving a mission. He talked about his mission, what it had meant to him, the people he served, and how much he loved his time as a missionary. He then dropped a bombshell of his own when he announced that he had loved his mission so much that he was going to start the process to return to the mission field and complete the assignment he had been given over two years ago.
Everyone in that room gasped, broke into smiles, and some into tears. Except for me. I sat there dumbfounded that these two boys, who had no way of knowing what each other was thinking and planning, were now on another journey together. Our families were going to experience this together whether we wanted to or not. But no one knew yet of our son's plan. We hadn't told a soul at this point and had no plans to for quite some time. We wanted certainty and answers before upending everyone's world once again.
After Relief Society and after all the swarm of sisters had left my friend I just hugged her and asked how she felt about all this. She was as equally surprised as everyone else had been in that room. She had known he had been having thoughts and feelings about returning but didn't know until then that he was truly serious about it. I told her how happy I was for them and if she needed to vent we could bundle up and start walking again. I did not tell her about my sons plan. In a way I was very thankful that her son had made the public announcement. It would be easier to watch them be slightly ahead of us in this process so I would know what to expect. All the attention would be on their family and we could quietly go about our process without the eyes of others watching us. I wasn't as confident and happy about my son's decision to return as this Elder's mom was. I guess my faith was lacking - my fear was taking over again.
After church I told my husband what had happened and he too found it unbelievable in the best way possible. He too was thankful we would have a family to watch and he too agreed that telling people right now wasn't right nor was it our place. That was our son's decision. My husband and I laid in bed that night processing the changes and journey's both our families were about to embark on again. Just like when they had both returned home within weeks of each other we wondered if they would both return to the mission field within weeks of each other. It was too crazy of an idea to believe for me. That just didn't happen. Would my friend and I have a lot to talk about when we started walking again in the spring? And then I wondered what in the world had been in the water during Christmas break and whatever it was, it had been contagious!
My friend and I spent the first summer of our son's returns walking (see blog post Sept. 2012 "No escaping the title of ERM...) and talking about the journey we were on. We found strength and comfort in each other and by the end of the summer we felt we had grown and healed a little bit. We were both ready for the next phase of life to begin. By fall, both our son's had returned to activity in the church and both had the light of Christ in their eyes. My son had moved away but her son lived at home and still attended our ward.
One cold day in January, not long after my son had dropped his announcement of his desire to return to the mission field, my friend's son had been asked to come to Relief Society and talk about the Priesthood, his duties, and what it meant to him. He is an amazing young man from an equally amazing family and he did a great job. All the sisters were enjoying listening to him and admiring him for his bravery and honesty. He had been asked to speak about the duties of an Elder and one of those duties was serving a mission. He talked about his mission, what it had meant to him, the people he served, and how much he loved his time as a missionary. He then dropped a bombshell of his own when he announced that he had loved his mission so much that he was going to start the process to return to the mission field and complete the assignment he had been given over two years ago.
Everyone in that room gasped, broke into smiles, and some into tears. Except for me. I sat there dumbfounded that these two boys, who had no way of knowing what each other was thinking and planning, were now on another journey together. Our families were going to experience this together whether we wanted to or not. But no one knew yet of our son's plan. We hadn't told a soul at this point and had no plans to for quite some time. We wanted certainty and answers before upending everyone's world once again.
After Relief Society and after all the swarm of sisters had left my friend I just hugged her and asked how she felt about all this. She was as equally surprised as everyone else had been in that room. She had known he had been having thoughts and feelings about returning but didn't know until then that he was truly serious about it. I told her how happy I was for them and if she needed to vent we could bundle up and start walking again. I did not tell her about my sons plan. In a way I was very thankful that her son had made the public announcement. It would be easier to watch them be slightly ahead of us in this process so I would know what to expect. All the attention would be on their family and we could quietly go about our process without the eyes of others watching us. I wasn't as confident and happy about my son's decision to return as this Elder's mom was. I guess my faith was lacking - my fear was taking over again.
After church I told my husband what had happened and he too found it unbelievable in the best way possible. He too was thankful we would have a family to watch and he too agreed that telling people right now wasn't right nor was it our place. That was our son's decision. My husband and I laid in bed that night processing the changes and journey's both our families were about to embark on again. Just like when they had both returned home within weeks of each other we wondered if they would both return to the mission field within weeks of each other. It was too crazy of an idea to believe for me. That just didn't happen. Would my friend and I have a lot to talk about when we started walking again in the spring? And then I wondered what in the world had been in the water during Christmas break and whatever it was, it had been contagious!
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