Every month my 12 year old daughter and I have a date to McDonalds for lunch after she sees the orthodontist. She informs me she deserves her monthly date because she has to endure the torture of wearing braces. As we were sitting in McDonald’s eating our hamburgers I noticed a young man, probably close to the same age as my son that was obviously handicapped who was working in the lobby. As my daughter was talking to me I began to watch this young man more closely. I watched him clear off a table and then sweep the floor around the table. Every movement he made was slow, painfully awkward, and he seemed so uncertain of what he was supposed to be doing. As a mom my heart went out to this young man that was struggling to complete such a simple and easy task. What would have taken me 5 minutes to do was taking this young man 30 minutes to complete. He finally completed his job and then went on his lunch break. He stood by the table he had just finished cleaning and began another long and painfully slow process of pulling a very bulky wallet out of his pocket. It took him several attempts and several minutes to finally pull his wallet out and get $3 so he could order lunch. I couldn’t help but notice how thin and boney his hands were and how his movements were painstakingly slow.
As I continued to watch this young man my heart felt full as I realized he was someone’s son. Somewhere there was a mom who has watched her son struggle with the simplest tasks in life. I was not this young man’s mom but in the few minutes I had been watching him I wanted to help him clean his table, sweep the floor, get his wallet, and serve him lunch. I wanted to do everything for him so I wouldn’t have to watch him struggle. I wanted to put my arms around this young man and tell him how awesome I thought he was for working when it was obviously a challenge for him. I wanted to find his mom and say, “you must be so proud of your son for his ability to work in spite of his physical handicaps.”
And then it hit me. I have not always showed that same love and compassion to my own son. Physically, on the outside, he is just fine. But on the inside, spiritually, he is no different from the young man I was watching and wanted to help. I had to remind myself that I need to have that same love and compassion for my own son who is perhaps just as emotionally and spiritually handicapped right now as this young man is physically handicapped. At that moment it didn't make any sense to me why I could have so much love and compassion towards this young man and not towards my own son. I realized how very wrong I have been to let my hurt and anger overpower my ability to help my own “handicapped” son who took the first steps to heal himself spiritually. I needed to remind myself to my son how awesome I thought he was in spite of how public and difficult his journey has been.
Sometimes I wish emotional and spiritual handicaps were as obvious as physical handicaps but they aren't. Our inside handicaps need more love, compassion, and understanding than maybe those that struggle with such obvious physical disabilities. As hard as it is to watch a child struggle I know it’s in those struggles that we become teachable, whole and healed. None of us are any different from that young man in that we all struggle while a loving Heavenly Father watches over us and has made it possible for us to be whole again. I needed that reminder in a McDonald's on a dreary winter day. I’m so thankful Heavenly Father allows us to have these lessons during hard times.
As I continued to watch this young man my heart felt full as I realized he was someone’s son. Somewhere there was a mom who has watched her son struggle with the simplest tasks in life. I was not this young man’s mom but in the few minutes I had been watching him I wanted to help him clean his table, sweep the floor, get his wallet, and serve him lunch. I wanted to do everything for him so I wouldn’t have to watch him struggle. I wanted to put my arms around this young man and tell him how awesome I thought he was for working when it was obviously a challenge for him. I wanted to find his mom and say, “you must be so proud of your son for his ability to work in spite of his physical handicaps.”
And then it hit me. I have not always showed that same love and compassion to my own son. Physically, on the outside, he is just fine. But on the inside, spiritually, he is no different from the young man I was watching and wanted to help. I had to remind myself that I need to have that same love and compassion for my own son who is perhaps just as emotionally and spiritually handicapped right now as this young man is physically handicapped. At that moment it didn't make any sense to me why I could have so much love and compassion towards this young man and not towards my own son. I realized how very wrong I have been to let my hurt and anger overpower my ability to help my own “handicapped” son who took the first steps to heal himself spiritually. I needed to remind myself to my son how awesome I thought he was in spite of how public and difficult his journey has been.
Sometimes I wish emotional and spiritual handicaps were as obvious as physical handicaps but they aren't. Our inside handicaps need more love, compassion, and understanding than maybe those that struggle with such obvious physical disabilities. As hard as it is to watch a child struggle I know it’s in those struggles that we become teachable, whole and healed. None of us are any different from that young man in that we all struggle while a loving Heavenly Father watches over us and has made it possible for us to be whole again. I needed that reminder in a McDonald's on a dreary winter day. I’m so thankful Heavenly Father allows us to have these lessons during hard times.
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